As a counsellor working with couples in the Reading area, I've seen how coercive control can silently corrode relationships and leave lasting scars on individuals. In its essence, coercive control is about domination and manipulation, exerting power over you through various tactics. Recognizing the signs of coercive control is the first step toward reclaiming your autonomy and seeking the support you deserve.

What is Coercive Control?

Coercive control is a pattern of behaviours aimed at dominating and controlling you. It operates through manipulation, intimidation, and undermining your sense of self-worth and autonomy. This form of abuse can occur in various types of relationships, including romantic partnerships, family dynamics, and friendships.

The Many Forms of Coercive Control

Coercive control can manifest in numerous ways, each designed to maintain power and control over you:

Isolation: The abuser may isolate you from friends, family, or support networks, making you dependent on them for social interaction and validation.

Monitoring and Surveillance: Excessive monitoring of your activities, such as checking your phone, tracking your movements, or controlling your access to technology.

Manipulation and Gaslighting: Gaslighting involves manipulating your perception of reality, making you doubt your thoughts, feelings, and memories.

Threats and Intimidation: The abuser may use threats of violence, harm to loved ones, or other forms of intimidation to control your behaviour and decisions.

Financial Control: Limiting your access to financial resources or sabotaging your efforts to become financially independent.

Emotional Abuse: Verbal insults, degradation, and manipulation of emotions to maintain control over you.

How Coercive Control Affects You

Coercive control can have devastating effects on your mental and emotional well-being. It can lead to anxiety, depression, PTSD, and a diminished sense of self-worth. You may feel trapped and powerless, unsure of how to escape the cycle of abuse.

Breaking free

Counselling provides a safe and supportive space for you to explore your experiences, process your emotions, and develop strategies for breaking free from the cycle of abuse. A skilled therapist can help you rebuild your self-esteem, set boundaries, and regain a sense of agency over your life.

If you or someone you know is experiencing coercive control, please know that you are not alone. Counselling can provide the support and guidance you need to reclaim your autonomy and build a life free from abuse. Take the first step toward healing by reaching out for help today.