Something feels off. You're questioning yourself constantly, second-guessing your memory, wondering if you're losing your mind. Your partner insists you're being "too sensitive" or "imagining things," yet that nagging feeling persists. As an online counsellor working with clients in the Reading area, I've supported many people who've discovered they were experiencing gaslighting - a form of psychological manipulation that can be devastatingly subtle.

What Is Gaslighting?

Gaslighting occurs when someone systematically undermines your perception of reality, making you doubt your own thoughts, feelings, and memories. It's named after a 1944 film where a husband manipulates his wife into believing she's going insane.

The Warning Signs

You're Constantly Questioning Yourself

Do you find yourself wondering if you're remembering things correctly? Gaslighters deliberately distort facts, making you doubt your own recollections.

Your Feelings Are Dismissed

"You're overreacting." "You're too emotional." If your partner consistently invalidates your emotions rather than addressing your concerns, this could be gaslighting.

They Deny Things You Know Happened

When confronted about their behaviour, they flat-out deny events occurred, leaving you confused and questioning your sanity.

You're Walking on Eggshells

Constantly monitoring your behaviour to avoid conflict? This hypervigilance often develops when living with manipulation.

They Use Your Vulnerabilities Against You

Personal information you've shared becomes ammunition in arguments, twisted to make you feel unstable or unreliable.

You've Lost Confidence in Your Judgment

Once decisive, you now struggle with simple choices, constantly seeking validation from others.

Friends and Family Express Concern

Loved ones notice changes in your behaviour, confidence, or wellbeing that you might not recognise yourself.

Trust Your Instincts

If these signs resonate, trust that inner voice. Gaslighting is insidious precisely because it makes you doubt your own perceptions. Your feelings are valid, your memories matter, and you deserve to be heard and respected.

As a counsellor, I've witnessed the profound impact gaslighting can have on individuals. If you recognise these patterns in your relationship and want support in understanding and addressing them, I'm here to help.

Don't hesitate to reach out and schedule a session. Together, we can work on rebuilding your confidence, trusting your instincts, and developing strategies for healthier relationships. Your journey towards reclaiming your voice and sense of reality starts with recognising these important warning signs.